Joyous Days

Oh my darling readers, where to begin?!  These are the days that the Lord has made.  I will rejoice, and be glad!  Here it is, the last day of January, and I am busily doing laundry to hang out on the clothes line.  The smell of laundry fresh in from the line is utter bliss, in my opinion!  The weather over the last few days has been gorgeous here in Missouri!  Yesterday, we tied a record high that has been in place since the late 1800's!  I bravely decided to start some seeds for an early spring garden, my optimism running high.  Yesterday afternoon, after finishing up schoolwork, the children and I went outside for a raucous game of red light, green light and their favorite-Captain Midnight!  We took turns launching their Nerf Rocket into the blue sky (Kenny was home in time to join in on that fun) and Elizabeth and I took a walk in the woods on our property!  The birds have been happily cavorting around the bird feeders on the front porch.  The dogs have been joyously frolicking around the yard as though they had discovered childhood all over again!  These are the days when the soul and body sing joyously with creation, enveloped by the beauty that it has to offer. It has been a fabulous stretch of days!

The mail brought a pleasant surprise as well!  On Friday night, I had ordered a used copy of Leslie Weatherhead's book "A Private House of Prayer" and it came in the mail yesterday afternoon!  The book is even more amazing than the excerpt that I posted the other day from the book!  I'll be writing more about the book later on, but for now, allow me to highly recommend that you get your hands on a copy of the book, if at all possible!  It is a GEM!  I can not believe that Abingdon let the book go out of print years ago!

Sunday brought some wonderful surprises as well.  My friend Diana (who also happens to be our church secretary) mentioned that there were some old books in the basement that were up for grabs, so I went down to take a look, after Sunday School.  It was like finding the pot of Gold at the end of the rainbow!  I walked out of there with as many books as I could possibly carry.  I didn't even get through half of the collection that was down there!  One of the books is "The Other Side of Silence-A Guide to Christian Meditation" by Morton T. Kelsey and it has been a wonderful read so far.  I've already made it to chapter 4 and just in those few chapters, I have found some gems of insight worth writing about.  I also found a collection of Great Devotional Classics that Upper Room Ministries put together back in the 60's and although I haven't had a chance to read through them all, I have already found a gem to write about there, as well!  Add to that my daily Bible reading, which has produced some new insights and "ah-ha" moments, and I have about a months worth of blog posts floating around in my head!

Prayers, meditation, mystics, insights and joyous ordinary moments-it has been a splendid few days!  It's like somebody turned the tap from a trickle to a full blown gush!  I am breathless trying to keep up, and enjoying every minute!

Stay tuned, darling readers.  May you have a joyous day!

Stages Along The Way

Our youth group took a field trip this weekend with our wonderful youth leader, Crystal and Rev. Jeff.  So that meant we had a “guest” minister at church on Sunday.  Rev. Fred Smith is not a stranger, he is actually “retired” (I don’t think ministers ever fully retire from ministry) and a member of our congregation at FUMC Washington.  We just don’t get the chance to hear him preach at our church very often and it is always a pleasure to hear one of his sermons!  Yesterday was no exception!

Fred preached on Mark 1:14-20 and how the disciples dropped everything to answer when Jesus called.  He talked about how they had no idea what was expected of them, the call did not get a job description!  Yet, they followed anyway!  He talked about his own call to ministry and how he had no idea if he had the gifts and graces, yet God gave him what he needed, when he needed it.  Fred made me cry (not in a bad way!)  Fred has this wonderful gift of making a simple message really hit home!

I thought about this as I was reading in Genesis chapters 12-15, in the Wesley Study Bible, which details the call of Abram.  The notes emphasize Abram’s radical obedience to the call.  But I noticed a couple of passages that the notes did not emphasize.  I’m going to emphasize what caught my eye by capitalizing the phrase in the verse.  The first one is Genesis 12, verse 9:

“And Abram journeyed on BY STAGES toward the Negeb.”

The second one is Genesis 13 verse 3:

“He journeyed on BY STAGES from the Negeb as far as Bethel to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai,”

When you look at the definition of the word “stage” in the dictionary, you find that there is a very long list of meanings.  Here are just a few:

“the scene of an event; a stopping place in a journey; a point, period or level in a progressive change or development; the distance between two stopping places as a division of a journey”

So, when we talk about Abram making a journey “by stages,” this isn’t just a physical moving about, there is also a spiritual journey as well!

This point is really driven home in chapter 13 when Abram and his nephew, Lot, part ways.  The parting came about because both men had a lot of livestock and the land could not support such a crowd.  The herdsmen were bickering with each other over the limited resources.  Now the notes say that the custom of Ancient Near Eastern tribes was that the younger defer to the older as a show of respect.  But Lot did not do this when he chose where to settle.  The notes say “he chose the best for himself, basing his decision entirely upon his sense…”  The notes go on, further detailing the difference between Lot and Abram “Lot hungrily desires the best his eyes can see, while the Lord charges Abram to see more than he can otherwise imagine.”  The key to getting to the next stage?  “Seeing” more than you can otherwise imagine.  Trusting the Lord to give you what you need when you need it!

The Apostle Paul, makes this same point in Romans 8:24-25 when he says:

“For in hope we were saved.  Now hope that is seen is not hope.  For who hopes for what is seen?  But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.”

Did you ever feel like you were being called or gently nudged to do something but you hesitated?  Or maybe you just flat out rejected the idea as being totally insane because you did not have the skills to accomplish the task?  You could not see how you could possibly accomplish such a thing?!  Maybe you did try once before and failed.  Maybe someone close to you told you that you would never be able to do the task.  You are in good company!  I know I have fallen prey to this pitfall on far too many occasions!  Usually I end up kicking myself for missed opportunities!  And I have a hard time forgiving myself for not following through.  Vicious cycle isn’t it?

But if we take the lesson of Abram to heart, perhaps we would be a little bit gentler with ourselves.  Abram did not become Abraham overnight!  He had a lot of journeying to do before he got to that point.  He traveled both physically and spiritually in stages.  That’s how life works.  We don’t gain maturity overnight.  It comes over years of time and it comes in fits and spurts.  There are stages of progress.  Sometimes we grow fast and other times we seem to level off.  Ask yourself-are you the same person today that you were five years ago or 20 years ago?  Of course not because life is a journey!  We are told that by faith we are saved.  Yet we have no tangible proof of that, but as Paul says “for in hope we are saved.”  Hope is believing in what you can not physically see or, in the case of Abram “seeing more than you can otherwise imagine.”  Our faith is strengthened over time as we go through new experiences and learn new things.  We are challenged, we grow, we level off and we are challenged again.  Sometimes we will miss chances and opportunities and sometimes we will fall flat on our face.  It is all part of the process of each individual life journey!  At each stage, God extends his loving (and forgiving) grace.  All he asks is for us to trust him to lead the way!

If God can forgive us our shortcomings maybe it’s time we do the same.  Instead of dwelling on the opportunities that we missed in the past, make today the day where you focus on the future.  Make the choice to trust God to lead.  Even without a job description, even without any tangible proof, even if you can not see the possibility of success, choose to say yes to God anyway!  Choose to hope in faith.  Choose to see beyond what you can imagine.  Believe that when you get to the next stage God will give you what you need when you need it!  And know that God is right there-walking with you through every stage on the way!

May Your Soul Prosper!

Let’s look at one verse from 3 John from four separate translations and see how they compare.
3 John, verse 2:

NIV Translation:

“Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.”

NRSV Translation:

“Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, just as it is well with your soul.”

Amplified Bible:

“Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in every way and (that your body) may keep well, even as (I know) your soul keeps well and prospers.”

The Message paraphrase:

“I pray for good fortune in everything you do, and for your good health-that your everyday affairs prosper, as well as your soul!”

In this letter, John is writing to Gaius, a church leader, to commend him for his hospitality and to warn him about not following the lead of Diotrephes who is only concerned with himself.  This verse is used a lot when talking about the Prosperity Gospel that is preached in some circles.  God wants you rich, God wants you to have that Cadillac, they tell you.  Well, hold on a minute!  What is supposed to prosper the most?  If you read the entire verse, what truly matters is that your SOUL prospers!  Things and good health are not guaranteed.  They are hoped for, but what matters most is how well does your soul prosper?

I thought about this as I thought about all of the individuals making resolutions for the New Year.  Many are health related, such as lose 20 pounds or quit smoking or exercise more.  Good ideas that are usually out the window and forgotten by March.  Not because they were not well intentioned but because they were not so convinced that it could be done in the first place.  Things that had happened in the past proved that they just couldn’t do it.  As far as resolutions go, I don’t think I have ever heard someone say “I am going to work on making my soul prosper.”  Maybe we should consider making that kind of resolution.

In the Wesley Study Bible the notes say that 3 John shows that both evil and good can be found within a congregation.  “Gaius…. supports the elders understanding of the Christian Mission by making his resources of home and money available to itinerant Christian ministers.  Diotrephes, on the other hand, serves himself by seeking to undermine the elder’s influence in refusing hospitality to these missionaries and preventing those who want to help from doing so.”  The Message paraphrase says this: “The two most difficult things to get straight in life are love and God.  More often than not, the mess people make of their lives can be traced to failure or stupidity or meanness in one or both of these areas…there are always people around who don’t want to be pinned down to the God Jesus reveals, to the love Jesus reveals.  They want to make up their own idea of God, make up their own style of love.”

If you stop and think about it, it makes a lot of sense that how well you are on the inside “the soul” correlates to how well you are on the outside.  What you carry inside of you will manifest outwardly.  Your idea of God or love will show up in some manner.  So, perhaps we should consider what we are carrying around inwardly first before we make those resolutions for outward change.  Maybe the first place to start is getting rid of some of the inward baggage.  Still angry at someone?  Still nursing an old wound?  Still feeling like the victim?  Still making the excuse that you do certain things because you were damaged or hurt by what (insert name here) did to you twenty years ago?  Whether we like to admit it or not, old baggage from things that happened that we can not change, can and will weigh us down.  Bad things happen, even to good people.  It’s what you do with it that matters!  If it simply is a weight around your neck than it is not doing you or anyone else any good!  It’s time to let it go.  It is time to choose to love yourself like Jesus loves you and it is time to love others in the same way.  No more my style, it’s time to choose Jesus style!

So here’s a suggestion.  Take all of those things, those issues and write them down.  Make a list.  Then take the list and burn it or shred it beyond recognition.  Make sure you can not tape it back together no matter how hard you might try.  Commit to turning it over to God and then commit to letting it go.  Don’t take it back again.  If something comes up in your mind again say to yourself “I already let that go and turned it over to God” and then move on to something else.  I know, it is easier said than done but I also know that it can be done.  

It is much easier to move forward and create new good positive feelings and memories when you let go of  the old negative ones.  It is easier to accept love when you let go of those things that you think make you unlovable.  It is easier to love others when you can learn to love like Jesus loved.  How does your soul prosper?  May it prosper well!

May your everyday affairs prosper as well as your soul prospers in 2012!

Pondering John's Baptism

This weekend my daily Bible reading took me further in to the Book of Acts, which I've read many times before.  But I was really struck by this story about Paul, and some disciples, in a way that I had never been struck before.  Maybe it is because I am reading it in The Message paraphrase or maybe I just never paid close enough attention!  Anyway, here it is, from Chapter 19:

"Now it happened that while Apollos was away in Corinth, Paul made his way down through the mountains, came to Ephesus and happened on some disciples there.  The first thing he said was 'Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?  Did you take God into your mind only, or did you also embrace him with your heart:  Did he get inside you?' 'We've never even heard of that-a Holy Spirit:  God within us?' 'How were you baptized, then?' asked Paul.  'In John's baptism.'  'That explains it,' said Paul.  'John preached a baptism of radical life-change so that people would be ready to receive the One coming after him, who turned out to be Jesus.  If you've been baptized in John's baptism, you're ready now for the real thing, for Jesus."

I want to point out a few things here-first Paul did not question the fact that they were disciples.  Second, he didn't question the fact that they were baptised.  By asking them if they had received the Holy Spirit, he was in essence asking them what type of baptism they had received.  When the disciples replied "John's baptism", you see Paul saying "That explains it!" 

A modern day reader might look at that exchange and conclude that the disciples were not really baptised because it's assumed that it is a given that we are baptised by the Holy Spirit.  I think Paul would disagree with that assertion.  So, here's what I am pondering.  Those who are in the church are baptised, but how many in the church are stuck in John's baptism?  Weird question?  Let me explain.

Paul describes John's baptism as "radical life change so people would be ready to receive the One coming after him" or in other words  taking "God into your mind only."  They received the Holy Spirit but they had not yet "embraced" the Holy Spirit. 

I may be splitting hairs here but I do wonder how many people are sitting in our churches longing for something more and yet getting the impression that this is as good as it gets in their spiritual life.  Faith, to them, is an intellectual exercise that you try to apply in a practical way in your daily life.  I believe taking faith beyond the church doors and using it in your daily life matters!  But I also get the sense that people are longing for something deeper, something more and they're not sure how to find it!  They sense, that there is something more, that there should be something more but how do you find that something more?

Apollos taught what he knew.  He taught it faithfully and well and the disciples followed.   Paul came along and showed them the next step.   They were not aware that there was something more.  Modern day Christians don't have the same exact problem but there is a similar issue-who will teach them how to take the next step?  Who will help point the way to something more? 

This may seem like a weird thing to bring up during Advent but think about it-when a woman experiences pregnancy she knows that the baby and her body will go through change.  There is a process that happens.  There is something more than simply being pregnant.  The first flutter, the first strong kick, the first bout of 3 a.m. false labor.  All of it leads up to the big event, the actual birth!  But there is even more after that-there is raising, to the best of our God given ability, the little helpless squirming bundle that is now in our arms!  There is always a next step, there is something more.  If you apply that analogy to the church-are we as a congregation teaching that something more?  Or are we just letting our members rest in a baptism that is similar to the baptism of John? 

It's a question that I think we should consider pondering.

Churches Trying to Find Their Way

I am continuing on my jaunt through Revelation and the Seven Churches and how their stories are similar to stories that we hear today.  Let's talk about the three churches that I put into "group one" from Tuesday's blog post.  These are the churches that appear to be churches but, in essence, have lost their zeal and their core.  They are the congregations without depth, a mere shell of what they once were and are on the path to dying if they do not change their ways.  These are the churches where you have members who long for the good ole days.  These are the churches where you have members who will try just about anything to try to turn the tide of decline.  They didn't plan to decline, it just happened!  Or, perhaps there was a difference of opinion which caused a rift and some of the members left.  Either way, they are not what they used to be when they started out.  Ephesus is told "you have abandoned the love you had at first." (Revelation 2:4).  Sardis is told "you have a name of being alive, but you are dead." (Revelation 3:1).  Laodicea is told "you are neither cold nor hot." (Revelation 3:15).

In modern day parlance, these are churches that our conference would identify as needing to be revitalized, particularly if they were in a "strategic area" (i.e. urban center or large community).  So the conference "lovingly" and "strongly" recommends that the church members agree to participate in a revitalization program (in our area, they call it the Healthy Church Initiative).  If the church agrees to participate, there are books to be read, consultants are sent in, secret shoppers show up at unknown times, teams are created and then a report is issued with prescriptions of what the church needs to do to turn itself around.  A mission statement and vision statement are created and the congregation has a year to implement the prescriptions.  Periodic "progress report" meetings are held during this time to make sure the church is staying on track.  My church chose to participate in the process.

Let me just say this, because I know I am about to tread in touchy territory as I voice my opinion.  Healthy Church Initiative is a good idea, as far as it goes.  My church was excited to participate and we did really well through the process.  I applaud the conference for trying to come up with a workable process.  There were changes made, and some of them worked out very well and they have had a positive influence.  But, there came a point when it seemed like the prescriptions became items to check off of a checklist rather than noble and worthy goals to accomplish.  I struggled for a long time trying to put my finger on the exact moment that the subtle change happened and I struggled with why it happened.  It wasn't until I heard Bill Hybels speak at the Leadership Institute that I made the connection and put words to the nagging feeling that lay just under the surface.  Bill gave a talk that he titled "5 Greatest Leadership Lessons" and it was a profound "ah-ha" moment for me at the time!  Here are the five lessons that he shared:

1)  Vision-paint a picture of the future that produces passion in people.  Watch out for "vision leaks".
2)  Get people in your church engaged.  There is a difference between agreeing with a vision and owning a vision.
3)  Make your gatherings memorable.  People are yearning for experience-to feel the touch of God, somehow, in some way.
4)  Pace yourself for the long haul.  "Hitting the wall" or "burn out" brings about anger-no depth.
5)  Pay attention to whispers from God.  Big things start with a whisper.  Discern-make sure they are from God then obey them.

Point number 2 was the "ah-ha" moment for me.  This also, in a round about way, gets back to the comment that John Meunier posted on my blog post from yesterday.  As a leader, as a church, you need to discern God's vision for you and your congregation, but at some point each individual has to take ownership of that vision.  Or, as Bill Hybels says, "you have skin in the game!"

Ron Crandall, in his book "Turn Around Strategies for the Small Church" says this on page 69:

"...pastors who lead congregations to find a corporate vision, have a personal vision already at work in their own lives.  They believe in a personal God who intervenes in history and changes people.  Their own experiences of conversion or their call to ministry are vivid, and they are thus convinced that God is ready and able to touch the lives of others."

The realization that I came to was that many agreed with the vision that came out of our Healthy Church Initiative.  Not everyone chose to "own" the vision. It was not a conscious choice or an intentional choice or even an outright rejection of the vision.  The effort was sincere, people were honestly looking for a way to improve!  But at some point along the way, the prescriptions became a checklist, rather than goals to help reach the vision.  The vision statement was warm and fuzzy enough to make you feel like it meant something but vague enough to leave room for interpretation.

Our members worked hard to try to fulfill the prescriptions.  Some burned out, and some ended up feeling hurt and angry because change didn't happen even though we as a congregation followed the prescriptions.  There are many good things going on at our church, but I sense that some long for more!

I often wonder what difference it would have made if we had written our own prescriptions?  Or, if instead of just having the prescriptions, if the consultants had led the congregation of literally writing goals and action items for each prescription listed?  If we had tied certain "action items" from the prescription, specifically to the vision would it have made a difference?    I can't say for sure that it would have made a difference but knowing the heart of the folks at my church I think it might very well have been the tipping point because the members would have had a say as to what was being done, how it was being done, but even more importantly why it was being done!

For me personally, I am a casualty of point number 4 on Bill's list.  I'm not angry, I'm just burned out.  Being at church is painful for me right now.  I love my church and I love my friends, my church family!  I see the hope that lives in them.  I also see the frustration and hurt and exhaustion.  I pray that the sparks of renewal become a flame.

Going back to Ron Crandall's book, on page 43, he talks about Howard Snyder's book "Signs of the Spirit". Howard discusses the 5 different but interrelated principles that historically have led to church renewal and revitalization through the ages.  They are:

1)  Personal Renewal-a dramatic, decisive experience or simply a deepening that gives greater peace and joy.
2)  Corporate Renewal-a dramatic spirit of revival sweeping the church, or simply by a gentle quickening of the church's life.
3)  Conceptual Renewal-God gives a new vision of what the church can and should be.
4)  Structural Renewal-simply finding the best forms, in our day and age, for living out the new life in Christ.
5)  Missiological Renewal-A church needing renewal is focused inward.  A renewed church focuses outward to mission and service in the world.

Maybe we, like the churches in Revelation, need a little more prayer.  And perhaps the conference can best help a church in these circumstances by bringing in the consultants and have them do the study, exactly as they have been doing.  But instead of the consultants writing the prescriptions, perhaps it would be best to lead the congregation to prayerfully consider  the information gathered, and write their own prescriptions.  It would help members connect to the vision and have "skin in the game".  They are not hopeless or dead, they are just trying to find their way.

The Blah Night of the Soul

So, I have been reading David G. Brenner's book "Opening to God, Lectio Divina and Life as Prayer" ever since I got back from Leadership Institute.  In my opinion, my prayer life is one of my weak spots.  This book, for me, has been a slug fest!  I am literally trying to slug my way through, which is highly unusual for me, because I am a fast reader and I should have had this book finished in a matter of days!

The book is not the problem, it's a great book!  I am the problem.  In the first chapter, Mr. Brenner talks about Thomas Green's stages of love.  Writing about the third stage he says this:

"If you don't know about desolation in prayer, you haven't been praying for very long.  I have certainly known long periods when it felt like my prayers were simply echoing in my head but not reaching God.  But, as we shall see, even desolation has its divine purpose.  For, here, in these periods of dryness in prayer, we can learn to drink deeply from the living water in ways that are not dependent on our senses.  It is in these dark nights that our soul can learn to see by faith, not by sight."  

I can relate to this point because I have had those times in my life when I felt like my prayers were going nowhere!  What I am experiencing right now is a little different.  I wouldn't  call it a dark night of the soul but rather the blah night of the soul.  I've hit a dry spell!  Not just with prayer but with my Bible readings, with church life, with everything.  I'm in the blah zone! I'm not heart broken, I'm not despairing, I'm not depressed.  I'm also not overly excited or inspired.  I'm neutral.  Life is just humming along and I'm going along with the flow.  There are things that make me happy and make me laugh.  There are things that make me angry and sad.  But nothing seems to surprise or shock me or really grab my attention.  It's just...there.

I know it'll pass but right now it is driving me nuts!  I have been doing my daily Bible reading and I'm still making notes but it's like I am picking up on the same things that I have been seeing for the last six months.  I've been tracking my prayers for the last 31 weeks (due to Disciple Bible Study) and they have pretty much been the same things over and over for that period of time.  I finally got to the point a couple of weeks ago where I just simply put an arrow pointing up in the prayer concerns slot because it was the same as last week and the week before and the week before that!  On the one hand, I guess I should appreciate the consistency.  On the other hand, I'm thinking to myself "what is wrong with me, that I'm not seeing any change or break through???"

Blah, blah, blah, blah.  Oh so pathetically blah!

I'm spending a lot more time watching the birds in the front yard and the way the shadows play across the tree tops.  Logically, I know this is similar to hitting the plateau in sports or exercise.  Eventually you break out of the plateau and start making progress again, but it can be very frustrating waiting for that break to happen!  It is most definitely, the blah night of the soul for me.  I have a hard time with waiting and being patient!

For those of you who may be feeling the same way, take heart!  It's normal.  It's not a lot of fun.  Eventually though, you will break through.  It's the waiting that is the hardest part!  May you move beyond the blah night of your soul and may you encourage others who are experiencing the same thing!  Not only do I pray that for you, but I am praying that for me as well!

Random Thoughts on a Blustery Day

The wind isn't simply blowing.  It is roaring, in great gulping bursts of movement.  We have a powerful cold front moving through, now that the rain has ended and it is doing it's very best to sweep the leaves off the trees.  I am reminded of Winnie the Pooh's greeting "happy winds-day Kanga!  Happy winds-day Roo!"

My frame of mind today is like this blustery wind, blowing this way and that, without landing on anything solid.  It's fleeting thoughts and fragments-a little of this and a little of that.  My Bible readings today didn't even evoke a sense of agreement or disagreement, which is unusual.  Nor did my fellow bloggers posts inspire me to respond in a witty manner.  I almost called this blog post "I got nothing".  But that's not entirely true.

My daily reading came out of Psalms, chapter 128 (The Message paraphrase).  This is what caught my eye:

"All you who fear God, how blessed you are!  How happily you walk on his smooth straight road!  You worked hard and deserve all you've got coming.  Enjoy the blessing!  Revel in the goodness!...Stand in awe of God's Yes.  Oh how he blesses the one who fears God!"

My first thought was that I could point out a lot of individuals around me, who are not feeling very blessed.  Does that mean that they are ungrateful because right now they don't see any blessings?  Or, is it that they have been knocked around for so long that they don't see any point in hoping for a blessing?  I think a lot of people feel like the oak leaves I saw blowing around or like the little birds attempting to fly.  The oak trees are down the hill at the bottom of my yard, yet, the leaves were twirling around, being blown uphill by the wind and it is any one's guess where they will land.  Then there are the little birds trying to fly from branch to branch, furiously flapping against the wind in order to reach the branch that they were aiming for.  When they finally land, they cling desperately while the wind whips the small branches around.  For many, this is how they feel day to day.

Then, my Disciple Bible Study reading covered Second Peter.  Beware false prophets for the end is near.  My thought was, how would my life be different if I believed that the end was near for me?  Let's face it, there is no guarantee of tomorrow.  Would I make different choices and live differently if I knew my end was fast upon me?  How different would we behave as a society if we knew that our end was fast approaching?  How different would the church be, if the church knew that its end was coming?  I don't have an answer to any of those questions and it's not something that I seem to be willing to wrestle with today.

No, today reminds me of home, and it is bittersweet.  On a day like today, my dad would go ahead and fire up his wood stove in his workshop and he would be busy with his various woodworking projects.  He would be making toys or birdhouses, just puttering around doing something that he truly loved.  He and mom would also be planning on what trees they were going to cut down to use for wreath making.  Mom always made wreaths every year for family and for a few neighbors which gave her a little extra spending money for the holidays.  Our dining room table turned in to a huge work table for mom as she created her beautiful wreaths out of real balsam and pine.  The smell would permeate through the house, absolutely one of the best smells ever in my book!  Even if I wasn't at home, when mom made the wreaths, you could always tell that she had been working on them, the minute you walked in the door.  The skies might be leaden gray and the wind could be howling, but it was always warm and cozy in the house because the freshness of outdoors came inside with those boughs.

Dad is not tinkering in his workshop and I'm not sure if mom will be making wreaths this year, now that dad is no longer with us.  That wonderful time of my life has ended.  The time of feeling safe and warm and cozy and a part of the natural environment around me is over.  Today I feel adrift, like the oak leaves blowing in the wind.  Today I feel like I am having to flap hard against the wind, like the small birds in the front yard.  Today, I mourn, just a little for what I no longer have in my life.  The memories that are evoked, are wonderful, but they remind me of how big a hole there is in my heart.  It's been almost one year since I made that emergency trip home because dad had been hospitalized.  All indications were that dad was not going to pull through and I was going home to say good-bye.  But he did pull through and even though he was diagnosed with cancer, the outcome looked positive.  Bless his heart, he was a fighter!  He made it through the holidays.  He didn't give himself permission to let go until February.  Instead of fighting against the wind, he chose to ride the current and let his soul soar.

Dad would have liked a day like today.  It gave him an excuse to be in his shop, tinkering, doing what he loved.   Today would be a day for feeling alive and connected and doing the things that he loved, for those that he loved.  Today I shed tears of sorrow and joy.  Sorrow because I miss him so very much.  Joy because I was so privileged to have him as a part of my life for so many years.

No Gadgets and Gizmos and Yet They Grow

So, the Methodist Church is seeing growth.  It just doesn't happen to be here in the United States.  It's happening on the continent of Africa.  It's happening in Korea.  It's happening in South America, just to give you a few examples.  In many of these areas "doing church" is not an easy task!  There are restrictions, freedom of worship is not a world-wide concept.  They do not have fancy sound systems, or state of the art video screens.  Many do not have access to the Internet and social groups and online Bible resources (let alone an actual Bible).  Many of them do not have running water let alone a bed to sleep in!  And yet, they grow!  They are vibrant and alive!

Why?

Why is it, that in places, where worship can get you killed, where poverty is the norm, where there is every reason to be mad at God for ones lot in life, the church grows?

Maybe it has to do with simple faith?  Or spirit?  Or message?  Maybe it has to do with keeping it simple?

I can picture the PhD Theologians cringing as they read these thoughts!  But has anyone ever considered the possibility that we have over-analyzed ourselves in the United States to our own peril?

Analysis can be good to a certain point.  But anyone who has been in therapy can tell you that too much of a good thing can become a bad thing!  You can analyze yourself to the point of inertia, all because of your quest to fix what you think is wrong.  Analysis overused, can become nothing more than a gadget or gizmo.  Think about this in terms of someone who walks in the door for the first time and decides to join our church.  Do they join because of our in depth analysis of best practices or do they join because of the spirit they sense in the community?   Are they impressed because of a word study about why a certain word was used in the English translation based on the historical Latin or Hebrew usage or do they connect with the message that they are hearing?

What message is being shared so powerfully around the world that they connect with people in such deep and profound ways? The leaders elsewhere seem to have their fingers on the pulse.  And what works elsewhere may not work here in the United States, but can we say, with all honesty, that we have our fingers on the pulse?

Grow, grow, grow, we are told over and over again.  Outreach and mission in the community-that's the prescription.  Make your worship services more vibrant.  Small groups are the solution.  How many of the churches elsewhere around the world consciously do these things?  How many are driven by these choices?  If I had to guess-not many!  I think that they do these things, but they do them naturally, organically-it's not a conscious thought or priority for them.  I think they do naturally celebrate in worship.  I think they do naturally try to help their neighbors and I think they do naturally have small groups that pray for each other and with each other.  I think these things happen, not by plan, but because it is a natural outgrowth of the message!

What is that message?  I'd love to know!  I would love to hear what the leaders from other countries have to say in response to that question!  Again, I'm speculating here, but my guess is, it's pretty simple.  We have all sinned and made mistakes in our lives.  But there is this man, who lived long ago, who was actually the Son of God.  His name is Jesus and God sent him to save us all.  He loves you so much that he gave his life for you.  Accept his gift of forgiveness and new life and then share the story with your family and friends.  Follow his footsteps.  Love others, even those individuals that are hard to love.  Do good every chance you get.  Most importantly, share the story.

I could be completely wrong on this line of thought (as if that would be the first time) but, ya know, it really does make me wonder and think.  No gadgets, no gizmo's, no healthy church prescriptions and yet they grow!  Can we be humble enough to admit that we don't have all of the answers and look at what these churches do and how they do it and perhaps learn something?  Can we stop analyzing long enough to grasp the message that they so eloquently convey?  Perhaps the answer has been staring us in the face all along!  Perhaps the answer is just that simple!

Why do they grow?  This inquiring mind would like to know!

If You Look for Him, He Will Let Himself Be Found

In chapter 15 of Second Chronicles Azariah goes out to meet King Asa to deliver a message.  Here's how The Message paraphrase words the Prophet's message:

"Listen carefully Asa, and listen Judah and Benjamin:  God will stick with you as long as you stick with him.  If you look for Him, He will let Himself be found; but if you leave Him, He'll leave you."

The story of Asa is such a great story!  (Seriously, if you have never read it, take the time today and read it for yourself!)  Asa made the decision early on that he was going to follow God, really follow to the best of his ability.  He tore down the pagan altars and shrines.  He even removed his mother from the throne because she had built an image of Asherah, which he tore down and burned.   Asa is a reminder to all of us that one good follower can make a difference!

Further on in the chapter we read about the people gathering together to offer sacrifices and to worship and it says that after the sacrifice was offered:

"They bound themselves in a covenant to seek God, the God of their fathers, wholeheartedly, holding nothing back."

 Asa and the people seeking God together.  Can you imagine that?  It must have been an awesome sight!  The power of the praise and the prayers going forth.  The expectant waiting to hear the word of the Lord.  The Message paraphrase goes on:

"Anticipating the best, they had sought God-and He showed up ready to be found."

Wow!  How cool is that?!

Reading this made me start to think about how often I truly seek the Lord.  Do I do it wholeheartedly?  Do I seek without holding anything back?  I'm not talking about those times when things are crazy busy and hectic and I have enough time to utter a 50 second prayer.  I'm talking about intentional times when I am determined to hear a message.  I have to be honest.  I think there are times that I hold back.  Why?  Because I'm not so sure that I want to hear the plain unvarnished truth.  I know that probably doesn't make a lot of sense but for those who know me well, they know that I am my own worst critic.  I am far harder on myself than I am on anybody else!  I know this because I have family and dear friends who have told me "cut yourself some slack!"  They are the ones who tell me that I am too hard on myself!  So when I talk about "the plain unvarnished truth" I mean being afraid of hearing love spoken, I mean being afraid of hearing that I am forgiven.  Criticism I can take, cause I know my laundry list of faults.  Knowing that God loves me, warts and all is hard!  Because I fail.  I fail so many many times, I don't deserve that kind of unconditional love!  Seriously, how can someone who knows all, and sees all; someone who has been, who is now and ever will be, perfect in all things, love someone as utterly flawed and imperfect as me?  It boggles my mind!

That's what grace is all about though, isn't it?  It's about accepting what I don't deserve and have in no way earned, simply because God loves me.  Sometimes it is harder to accept love and forgiveness then it is to accept criticism.  I expect criticism, but I most definitely do not, always, expect love!  For me, I have to say that I don't go into a situation expecting the best.  This is perhaps, what holds me back-my own flawed expectations.

As individuals, are we afraid of hearing the truth as far as our shortcomings or are we afraid of hearing the truth that we are loved, despite our shortcomings?  Do we seek God but only go so far?  Do we seek God anticipating the best, or expecting the worst?  How different would our spiritual lives be if we could just trust enough to seek God, without holding back and anticipate the best?

Asa's story reminds me that God is waiting to be found by those who earnestly seek him.  Am I willing to step out a little further?  How about you?

Look for Him because He wants to be found!  Because He loves you and He Loves me!

Forgiveness-It's a Living Thing

King David-remember him?  He is described as a "man after God's own heart", the giant slayer, the great leader of Israel.  King David the ultimate perfect God follower.  If you read in the Old Testament though, you realize that he was just as flawed as the rest of us.  Maybe that's why he is included in so much of the Old Testament, as a reminder to the rest of us that God can use even flawed individuals to do great things!

So it was with great interest that I read Psalm 109 in The Message paraphrase which is noted as "A David Prayer".  It starts off in the positive:

"My God don't turn a deaf ear to my hallelujah prayer..."

It goes down hill from there.  Basically he is praying for God to obliterate an enemy.  Here's just a part of the Psalm:

"Give him a short life and give his job to somebody else.  Make orphans of his children, dress his wife in widow's weeds; Turn his children into begging street urchins, evicted from their homes-homeless.  May the bank foreclose and wipe him out, and strangers, like vultures, pick him clean.  May there be no one around to help him out, no one willing to give his orphans a break.  Chop down his family tree so that nobody even remembers his name." 

It goes on, but you get the gist.  This was not a lovey-dovey, warm and fuzzy prayer.  This was the prayer of a man at the end of his rope wishing that the person who persecuted him was wiped out!

Let's be honest, we have all had similar thoughts and prayers at some point in our lives.  Our prayers though, are not documented like David's prayers!  We have been wronged and yet, the other person just keeps on keeping on.  Why why why do they not get their come uppance?  Where is the delivery for us, the justice we seek?  Seriously, haven't we endured enough?  Good Christians are not supposed to think that way, yet we all have those moments.

There have been times in my own life when I have endured some things I would not wish upon anyone else!  There have been times when I wondered why a house didn't fall out of the sky (a la Wizard of Oz) or why someone didn't get struck by lightening because they oh so deserved that fate!  Forgiveness was not exactly high on my list.  I had done nothing wrong yet I was the one who was suffering.  They needed to ask ME for forgiveness, not the other way around!  THEY were the ones who needed to be stopped.  THEY were the ones who needed to pay.

Yet, Jesus told us to forgive.  Not just once but "seven times seventy", or in other words, forgive without end. "But God," we argue, "they surely don't deserve it and they definitely haven't earned it!"  But that's not the point.  Forgiveness is not about letting someone off the hook.  No, it's far more personal.  Forgiveness allows you to be free from carrying the burden.  Anger unchecked, festers and it turns into bitterness and bitterness will eat you from the inside out.  To become totally and utterly absorbed by bitterness is an ugly thing.  It clouds your perception and taints everything in your life.  How you live, your relationships with others, your work become driven by your need for revenge.  It not only effects you spiritually, but it can effect you physically.  The longer you carry the burden the heavier it gets and the more exhausted you become!  No wonder Jesus was so clear about the need to forgive!  Forgiveness isn't just a "thing", it's a living thing!  If you want to live, really live, then you have to make a choice to let things go.  YOU have to choose to forgive!

If I sound like I speak from the voice of experience, you're right.  I've lived out both scenarios.  One time, when I was younger and I couldn't let go of what had been done to me, I made myself so miserable that I got to the point that I didn't want to live.  I attempted suicide.  Not as a way to "get even", no, I just wanted the pain to end!  I wasn't sleeping, I certainly wasn't eating right and my only thought was revenge.  I was consumed with settling the score.  There was no room for forgiveness in my heart.  A wise friend talked with me about it and I described how I felt and I clearly said "I am the victim, I can't forgive, I don't have the strength to forgive!"  My wise friend said, "you don't have the strength but God does, give it to him!"  So I said a prayer, "not by my strength but by the Lord's strength I forgive."  And it wasn't easy!  I had to say that prayer over and over and over again!  After a time though, it got easier.  I had to say it less often.  It got to the point where my first thought in the morning was not about revenge on my assailant.  It got to the point when it wasn't the last thought at night.  Eventually I got to a point where I stopped thinking about it completely.  I went from victim to victor.  I learned to forgive and in the process I got my life back!

Fast forward to a few years ago when I was attacked and accused unfairly.  It was just as painful, I was just as angry.  The difference though was I refused to let the bitterness consume me!  It wasn't easy, but I had learned my lesson.  I didn't want to go back to the way I had been when I was younger!  So I said the prayer again and I kept going and kept living.  Lo and behold, there came an opportunity to get my revenge.  I could have filed charges and had this individual thrown into jail and had a lien put on all of his posessions.  He would have lost everything.  I had individuals telling me that I should go ahead because he had certainly earned it for the hell he had put me (and my family) through and he surely deserved it so why not settle the score?  I didn't do it.  In the whole scheme of things, my act of forgiveness was more important to me than the satisfaction I might gain from seeking revenge.  I had moved on and I wasn't going back!  I chose to forgive and then live and that mattered more to me!

In this life people will hurt you through no fault of your own.  Yes, you have been wronged.  You have a right to be angry about what you have lost.  But you also have a choice.  You can choose to nurse that anger or you can choose to forgive.  When you choose to stop carrying the burden you choose to live.  Instead of focusing your energy on what you have lost and the person responsible for that loss you are instead free to focus on moving ahead!  What you choose to focus on dictates how you live.  And living is a whole lot easier when you let go of that burden and choose to forgive!  Another word for forgiveness is grace.  Grace is the essence of living because it opens up new and wonderful opportunites.  It truly is a living thing!

So the lesson of David's Psalm is this-we may feel the exact same way as he did, and justifiably so!  We may even have times when we pray a prayer just like his prayer.  But we have a choice.  We can wrap that anger around us like a comfortable blanket until it encloses us in bitterness or we can let it go and choose to forgive. Our choice will effect how we live.  Choose to forgive if you truly want to live!

Spirit in you Vs. Spirit with you-That Sanctification Journey

Have you ever had one of those times when you are reading something that you have read, like a gazillion times, but you catch something that you missed before?  That happened to me this morning.  It was one of those "whoa, stop, back the train up" moments!

I'm on week 23 of Disciple Bible Study and this week focuses on the second half of the Gospel of John.  What caught my eye happens to be in the second half of verse 17 in chapter 14 talking about the Holy Spirit:

"...You know him, because he abides with you, and he will be in you."

The note in the Wesleyan Study Bible says this:

"The Spirit is already with the disciples but will not be in them until Jesus breathes on them." 

 The thought that popped into my head was "there is a big difference between the Spirit being with you and the Spirit being in you!"  Then I started thinking about how many people are in this very situation?  Which then led me to ask myself how many times have I had the Spirit with me or even in me and chose to opt out on what I was being asked to do?  Ah ha!  Maybe this is the process of Sanctification that Wesley was talking about!

There have been times in my life when I have felt completely alone and totally abandoned.  But as a Christian I know that is not true.  The Spirit is with me.  I may not have realized it, or felt it, but I was never truly alone!  And in hindsight, looking back on those moments I can see where the Spirit was working in me in ways that I did not realize or acknowledge.  I think there are a lot of people who can say the same thing (in hindsight of course).  God was not only with them but working in them, they were just so overwhelmed or distracted to realize it at the time!

There are times though, when I know that the Spirit is not only in me but also working in me and asking me to do something that I am not so sure about doing!  You think to yourself, "well if God wants it done, you will just joyfully agree to do what is being asked of you."  WRONG!  At least in my case, that's wrong.  Yeah, there is this little thing called "free will" which can sometimes be the "opt out" choice.  And there have been times when I have exercised that choice!  Of course, you would think I would learn that no is not the best answer yet, time and again, I make the same mistake!  Yup, my name is Trudy and I still mess up on occasion!

Macarius spoke about this in Homily 15  Even some of the saints and leaders of the early church stumbled.  He described it as "not having obtained to perfect charity".  Nowadays, we would call that "perfect love".  It's no wonder that Wesley talked about the process of Sanctification being a journey of going from "glory to glory".  Hopefully, with time, as you mature you get better at following the lead of the Spirit but we're imperfect and sometimes we will "miss the mark".  I miss the mark and I have to admit it and ask for forgiveness.  I am reminded daily that grace is a wonderful thing!

Oral Roberts used to tell the story of how he started Oral Roberts University.  He said that he asked God why he was the one being asked to do this when there were others who were far more qualified.  He said the answer he got back was "I did ask them but they won't do it!"  Makes me wonder how many times God has had to ask someone else to do the things he asked me to do in the first place?  I shudder to think!

So for those of you who have been in a similar situation, take heart!  You're not alone.  The Spirit is with you. The Spirit is in you.  The journey of Sanctification continues and God's grace abounds!  You're going to make mistakes, but God will still love you and he will provide opportunities to use you to share his love!  I may not have faith in my ability but God...I have faith in HIS ability!  And I am so grateful that he can find ways to use imperfect me!  Trust in the Lord because he can do all things, no matter how imperfect we may be!

Am I a Dissenter?

Paul has some pretty strong words in Titus regarding "leaders" and "rebels".  In chapter 1, here is what The Message paraphrase says:

"Those who were brought up religious and ought to know better are the worst.  They've got to be shut up.  They're disrupting entire families with their teaching, and all for the sake of a fast buck."

In chapter 3 Paul goes on to say:

"Remind the people to respect the government and be law-abiding, always ready to lend a helping hand.  No insults, no fights.  God's people should be bighearted and courteous." 

Well, I'm not out for a fast buck, if I was I would have enabled the ad feature on my blog.  I do support my leaders in church and in government.  But I have been critical of some of the choices that leadership has made in recent months.  Does that make me a dissenter?  A rabble rouser?   Am I part of the problem?

It's a tough question but I think that we all have to ask ourselves this question every once in awhile.  It can be hard to be objective when you have to examine yourself but I ask myself the question to make sure that my moral compass is on track.  Am I doing what is being asked of me to the very best of my ability?  The whole point of blogging for me is not merely to criticize, condemn and complain but hopefully, to make people think and to inspire and encourage!  Yes, there are things that concern me and I do bring them up on this blog.  But there is so much out there that encourages me and, in my mind, they are stories that need to be shared and told and celebrated!

I look at the words in Joel chapter 2:

"Your sons will prophesy, also your daughters.  Your old men will dream, your young men will see visions.  I'll even pour out my Spirit on the servants, men and women both."

 There is a heart element to this as well.  A spirit element.  I know in my heart and spirit that the time is right to help ordinary people connect with the words.  The Bible is not merely a book.  It is a treasure trove of faith and hope, love and wisdom.   But if people are not being taught how to make the connection to their everyday lives than it has no depth and meaning!  I'm not a minister, nor a theology major, nor a professor.  I'm not a leader in government and I don't lead a church.  In truth, I am overlooked and ignored by these individuals. I'm just an ordinary wife, mother, citizen and an individual who happened to take the Lay Speaking course so I could fill in for the minister if needed or help at church in some way.  There is nothing that marks me as extraordinary or special.  I'm plain ole me.  Nothing more, nothing less.  How could I possibly have anything important to say?

The thing that drives me though, the thing that gets me up every morning and makes me sit here and type, is that I see a need to help others understand that they can make a difference!  Ordinary people, just like me, do have a calling and a purpose-they can have an impact!  And I am driven by the need to help people connect the dots.  Here is this parable, or verse and see how it is very similar to what is going on in our world today?  You can relate to the Bible, you can apply what it says and you can make a difference!  Ordinary people can do extraordinary things!

There is a lot of uncertainty in this world right now.  A lot more questions than answers.  But hope lives!  We need to remind ourselves of that fact every once in awhile!  I think the words from the prophet Joel are true today-I think this is the time when young and old will see visions and dream dreams.  Ordinary folk who will have a vision, make the connection and do what is necessary to fulfill those dreams and visions.  I would love to believe that our leaders will "fix" things and make changes but everything in my being says no.  True vision and true change is going to come from the ranks of everyday people-those individuals who are willing to dream and to work to make change happen.

So, if that makes me a dissenter than so be it.  I pray for my leaders and I hope that wisdom will be their guide.  I know, dear readers, that you hope and pray for the same thing.  But I know that I am called to serve the ordinary.  If one story that I share connects with your spirit and inspires you to go out boldly and do what you can do, to the very best of your ability, then I have done what I have been asked to do.

Take those dreams and visions and run with them my darling friends!  Others may view you as ordinary, but I know that your potential is not ordinary.  Your potential is extraordinary!   I will be here, cheering you on as you go out and change your world for the better!  God bless you for having the courage to use your gifts and talents to make a difference in the world around you!

And to answer my own question, am I a dissenter?  I'm pretty confident, the answer is no.  But I'm glad I asked the question.

I'm not so sure I would have picked those Disciples!

I'll be honest, I would happily have taken a pass on gleaning examples to use in my blog post this morning!  Yup, it was one of those kind of days, when everything that could go wrong, tried very hard to go wrong! 

The down hill slide started as Rob and I pulled up to the bus stop only to see the tail lights as the bus pulled away.  The bus was there 10 minutes early.  To say I was not a happy camper would be an understatement!  Seriously, the driver couldn't look in his rear view mirror and see us pulling up???  Wait a minute, that's a rather judgemental statement on my part, he has a bus load of children to keep track of!  Oops!  Then Rob suggested that I drive him to the Elementary school and he would catch the bus there!  Excellent, problem solved!  We got half way there when Rob realized that he had forgotten some papers that he had to turn in today!  Seriously, couldn't he have gotten all of his stuff together last night????  Oh, wait, that's a judgement call isn't it-he had a boatload of homework.  My bad.  So we turned around and came back home so he could get his papers.  Did I mention that I was driving the "it's o.k. to drive to the bus stop but really this is the in case of emergency" vehicle?  This particular Jeep has had some issues with overheating and it's gotten worse recently!  The drive in to Washington is measured in miles, not blocks, so needless to say I was more than a little nervous about getting stranded on the side of the road like Kenny did just last week!  I was doing a whole lot of praying and watching that temperature gauge closely!  As we were coming around the blind corner on our private road we met a car-on our side of the road!  Fortunately, it's gravel so you can't go very fast but we came within inches of being hit!  Seriously, she couldn't drive on her own side of the road???  Wait a minute, she is in a low riding car and the other side is pretty rutted, maybe she was worried about taking out the bottom side of her car.  Guess I shouldn't judge too quickly!

And thus, this morning, I got my very own life lesson about the hazards of judging others too quickly!  Here I was all set to talk about the opening of the Martin Luther King memorial and how wonderful I think it is and how this is a modern day reminder not to judge others based on one thing and one thing only!  It is a good reminder and I am so thankful that there is a wonderful memorial to this powerful minister and modern day inspiration.    I think what made him so profound was his ability to inspire faith and hope in others.  He didn't view himself as a leader, he viewed himself as a servant and that combination is rather rare these days!  In the whole scheme of things he was a very unlikely choice to be a leader of a movement!

Which brings me around to Jesus and his choice of Disciples as described in the book of Mark.  Look at who he chose-fisherman and a tax collector!  Seriously????  No credentials, no training, no indication that they could be anything more than what they were already!  Yet, he handpicked these men to become the messengers of the good news!  Jesus didn't judge on who these men were, or where they came from or what they did for a living.  He apparently saw something more-a servant's heart and untapped potential!  Honestly, how many of us would have made the choices that Jesus made based on our usual way of judging people?  If this morning is any indication, I would have to honestly confess that I probably would not have picked these men.  I would have been too busy making snap judgements rather than looking beyond and seeing the potential.  Methinks, it's time I take the plank out of my eye and stop worrying about the speck in someone else's eye! 

I have a long way to go on my walk of faith!  Thank goodness the Lord is patient!  Lord, forgive my snap judgements and stupidity and help me overcome my shortcomings!  It is painfully obvious that the problem is me!

And by the way, I made the trip in to town and back without the Jeep overheating.  Thank goodness!  There but by the grace of God go I.  And some days, I'm not all that graceful!

Winning the Battle Starts with Showing Up!

The books of the Bible that deal with rules and bean counting are always hard reads for me, no matter what the translation is that I happen to be using!  It reminds me of history class when you had to keep track of the specific dates for various Civil War battles in order to pass the final exam.  If I could match a specific battle to a specific war I figured I had hit the bonus round!  Asking for the exact date?  That's an entirely different story!  I'm grateful that I absorbed enough information to figure out what happened and when it happened!  That's the same sort of view that I take with certain books of the Bible.  I'm never going to keep the genealogies and census numbers straight but if I can get the general idea then it's all good! 

There are little nugget gems to be found within the various law and number books if you keep reading.  Every once in awhile, something will jump out at me and I'll be like "huh, wonder why I didn't notice that before?"  Today's daily Bible reading had one of those little gem moments.  Take First Chronicles for example!  Chapter 9 discusses the list of exiles who came back to Jerusalem, and of course it names names.  It is a pretty standard list by clan and it involves the Priests, Levites and temple support staff.  But when you get to the Korahite family who were the guards at the temple gates there is this little bit of added information.  The Message paraphrase says this:

"David and Samuel the seer handpicked them for their dependability."

Now if you have any inkling of history, you know that the exile happened well after King David's time.  So the choice of this particular clan to be in charge of temple security happened long before the Babylonian exile and eventual return of the tribe of Israel to Jerusalem.  And the key reason as to why this particular clan was chosen for this specific duty was because they were dependable!  David and Samuel knew they could rely on them to fulfill this duty and that they would actually show up!  Even though a lot of time had passed, this was still true of the clan when they returned from exile.  The job would get done because this family would be there.  They would actually show up!

That is the moral of the story for today.  Part of winning your battles involves being dependable.  It involves not just talking about what you are going to do.  It is about showing up, doing the work and following through.  Want a modern example?  Firefighters have training and they have the equipment but if they don't show up to put out a fire it doesn't do you much good, now does it?  Teachers have training and they create lesson plans but if they don't show up to teach the class all that planning amounts to nothing.  Or, if you would like to jump in to the world of science fiction-a starship has warp drive but until Captain Picard says "engage" it doesn't really help you!  You can have the best plans, you can have the greatest tools but until you actually show up to do the work it amounts to absolutely zero in progress!  There is great value in being dependable!

Dependability is under-rated today.  It's just not a "glamorous" virtue like being utterly brilliant!  Having been an office manager I can tell you that I would take a dependable person over a brilliant person any day!  A dependable person is trainable.  Someone who has brilliant ideas but is not reliable is useless to me in an office setting because they are never around to follow through on their good ideas!  They are flighty.  My preference would be to have someone with both qualities-brilliance and dependability but if I had to make a choice, I would choose the dependable person.  It's not because I oppose new ideas but rather because I need to know that someone is going to be there to actually do the work!

So how does this apply to your life and your faith walk?  Well, let me ask you this.  Are you facing struggles and you have some good ideas on how to deal with them but you just haven't implemented them?  Why?  What is holding you back?  Is it because the task seems too daunting or is it because you believe someone else will take care of the problem?  If you happen to fall in to the second category-believing that someone else should take care of the problem-you may have a problem!  The only person you can change, the only person you have control over is you!  Doing the work, making small changes, that's how big changes occur.  But you have to "show up" to win the battle.  You, my darling friends must do the work.  You have to be dependable and reliable-for you!

The same thing applies not only in your personal life and your work life, but also in the life of a church.  If you want change, then you have to be willing to do the work!  You have to show up.  You have to be the reliable, dependable person!  I have a beautiful voice, I can sing.  But in order to be involved with the Praise Team I had to show up for practice and I had to show up to help lead worship on Sunday morning.  I could have all the good ideas I wanted but if I didn't bother to show up then those ideas would not come to fruition because there would be no one to follow through.  Being part of the team meant working for the best interest of the team.  And a big part of that involved simply showing up!  The team was successful because we knew that we could rely and depend on each other!  Things would get done because there was a reliable core who was willing to do the work!

I remember a conversation I had with a good friend of mine who also happens to be a very successful businessman.  As an office manager I was suddenly having to deal with moving large sums of money around which was something completly new to me and quite frankly, I was rather intimidated by the whole thing.  I mentioned this to my friend.  He also had experienced the same thing at first but he said "I got to the point where it didn't bother me any more.  A thousand dollars, a million dollars, same difference."  The uncomfortable became comfortable because it became normal.  It became normal because he showed up every day and did the same thing over and over again until it became second nature.  It wasn't randomly done, there was a specific plan and procedure to follow.  It worked because my friend was dependable and reliable and he showed up to do the work.  He looked at the problem and created plan A, B and C.  He addressed the issue head on and he did the work to win the "battle".  But his success would never have happened if he didn't bother to show up to "do battle" in the first place.  That's why being dependable is so critical to any success in life.  Change doesn't happen by itself.  Change depends on people willing to work the plan in order to make change happen!

Are you facing big problems?  Do you have some ideas on how to address them?  Do you want to see change?  Create a plan and then start doing the work.  If this is your battle than show up!  Face your challenges head on.  Engage in the action.  Be steady and consistent or in other words be dependable.   Battles are unavoidable but the art of winning the battle is showing up for the battle in the first place!  

As Captain Picard would say...Engage!

Sometimes You Just Have to Shovel the Manure

My daily Bible reading this morning came out of Psalms.  Psalm 93 in The Message Paraphrase starts off with this:

"God is King, robed and ruling.  God is robed and surging with strength.  And yes, the world is firm, immovable, Your throne ever firm-you're Eternal!"

My first thought was "this is exactly what I've been talking about the last few days!"  Then that little voice piped in and said "yes, and sometimes you have to dig through all the crap to get to that firm foundation."  My response was "Lord, you don't want me to write about manure do you???  Seriously????"  Well, folks, guess what the answer was to that question!  Yeah, today we're going to talk about the unglamorous world of shoveling manure!  This should be a doozey!

For those of you who did not grow up on a farm, you need to understand two things.  First, farm animals produce waste which comes out of the back side nether regions of their anatomy.  Second, farm animals do not clean up after themselves.  So, if you want your farm animals to stay healthy you have to clean up after them!  The responsible owner grabs their trusty pitchfork and shovel and starts scooping up the mixture of manure, straw, sawdust and hay and usually puts it in a wheelbarrow to cart it out to a pile outside of the barn.  And this mixture is not solid, it's kind of spongy and squishy so you have to make sure that you get down to the solid floor before you put down new bedding, otherwise you're just leaving the old stuff there to fester which isn't good for the animals.  It's a smelly job.  It's a lot of hard work.  But you know that if you are going to raise animals this comes with the territory!

So what about the pile itself.  Isn't it useful for something?  Eventually, yes, but it takes some time.  A gardener knows that you can't put fresh manure on a garden with fledgling plants because the nitrogen content is too high and it will literally burn the plants and kill them.  Manure is only good to a garden after it has rotted down or composted for awhile.  Well rotted manure provides helpful nutrients to plants when it is worked in to the garden soil.  Composting doesn't happen over night, it takes time to get it to just the right consistency to make it useful!

So what does manure have to do with theology and life?  Information overload.  Processes and procedures.  Sometimes so much is thrown at us at one time that we're not sure where the foundation lies!  We're simply walking on the spongy manure that covers the firm foundation!  If you let it lay there long enough it festers and then it becomes unhealthy for you!  In order to find that nugget of truth, that firm foundation, sometimes you just have to pick up a shovel and start digging!  You have to dig through all the crap in order to discern the truth, the firm foundation laid bare underneath all of the hype and spin!  You have to remove the manure!

Media outlets like to sensationalize lots of things-making mountains out of molehills at times.  One pundit says one thing, another pundit says the opposite-who is telling the truth?  Or, perhaps there are elements of truth in both positions?  In order to get to that truth you have to think critically and dig for the facts.  You must act to seek the source, the foundation upon which these opposing views are built.  If you want the truth, you have to do the digging!  Churches are not immune to this phenomenon either.  Lots of "new" ideas are being proposed and some of them can be helpful and some of them probably should be discarded.  But you'll never know which is which unless you are willing to do some shoveling to get down to the basics!

The same thing applies to your faith walk as well.  If you want to know the heart of God you have to do some digging and seek the foundation.  Scripture reading, prayer, worship and discernment are all critical tools to use!  They are your pitchfork and shovel and if you use them carefully you can dig down to the truth.  There may be things in your personal life that you just need to get rid of!  There may be things that eventually will bear fruit but they need to compost for awhile.  Spiritual discernment is the act of digging for the truth.  It's a journey that others can help you with but the work is something that you have do do for yourself.  It forces you to ask the question-do these things point to the source?  If not, then you have to do some digging and discard some of these things on to the pile outside the barn door!  And some of them may be like fresh manure-they are just too hot to use right now and they need to be allowed the time to compost down so they can be really useful.  Others just need to be removed in order to get to the truth!

Some of you will probably notice that I didn't mention mission and outreach in this list.  There's a reason for that-mission and outreach are outward signs of change that occurs within you.  You can't transform the world around you until you transform the world within you.  When inner transformation happens your vision and your mission have true meaning to you and clear purpose.  You're not going through the motions simply to go through the motions.  You're doing the work because you know that the work matters!  And John Wesley's sermons will back me up on this point!  Change comes from within!  Change is spirit driven!

Understand this though-underneath all the hype and hoopla God is still there!  He has always been there as the firm and solid foundation just like the Psalm says.  He can be found if you choose to go looking.  The job may be messy but you have the tools.  Sometimes in order to get to the truth you just have to decide to start shoveling the manure in your life.  Finding the foundation is worth the work and it is part of the journey.  Anyone up for a little dig?  I sincerely hope so! 

Sometimes You Gotta Fix the Foundation

When we got to Vermont last Monday our first stop was mom and dad's house.  My brother, Randy (my son's namesake) was already there and had already started working on the old Blacksmith shop in the back yard.  We all knew back in November when dad got sick that the building needed some work to stabilize the structure.  The back wall was sinking and it needed to be jacked up and repaired.  Now you might say, "why bother, why not just tear it down?"  The building is part of the local history of the town, and it has stood for a long long time.  It has a story to tell about where we came from and how we got to the here and now.  So, in our minds, there was never a question about fixing it, simply put, it needed to be done!

On closer inspection, Randy discovered something that we were not expecting.  The front wall was actually in far worse shape then the back wall.  The bottom base boards were supporting nothing at all!  The wood was literally crumbling into sawdust!  The only thing holding the building up was the center support beam that dad had installed years ago.  That's why it had shifted, that's why the back wall was sinking.  So the jacks came out and the front wall weight was placed on them and then the cutting began to remove the dry rotted wood.  New lumber was cut up and new support beams were placed under the wall to give it a stable foundation.  The back wall foundation will be replaced later on once the building settles on to it's new foundation on the front wall.  It's a process that will take some time but in the end, the building will be just as sturdy as it used to be!

Here comes the parallel to life, my little "ah ha" moment!  Sometimes the foundation which was sound in the first place, ends up crushing under the weight of the building put upon it and there comes a point when you have to rebuild in order to stabilize the entire building. 

Dad had told us, we had full warning.  I was reminded of this when I was reading about Jonah this morning.  Now Jonah is an interesting story.  He was, to put it mildly, a reluctant prophet.  Being asked to go to pagan Nineveh to warn them of their impending doom was not high on his priority list!  Let em burn!  Let em fall!  What's the harm?  So he took a boat heading in the opposite direction and well, you know the story, storm comes up, sailors have to throw him overboard in order to save their ship, he's swallowed by a whale and then a few days later he is spit up on the shore just outside of Nineveh!  It's not optional, he's going to deliver the message! 

To Jonah's shock and dismay, people actually listen!  They repent!  God changes his mind and doesn't destroy them!  How is that fair???  They had it coming!  Seriously, God, seriously???  Jonah, the reluctant prophet was rather a sore winner.  God's vision and victory was far different from Jonah's victory and vision.  Nineveh was able to start rebuilding the foundation before it was too late!  God works in wonderful and mysterious ways!

I can relate to Jonah and his reluctance.  I was very hesitant about starting this blog because quite frankly I knew there were times when I would have to say something that wasn't going to be popular!  I was going to have to say things that were hard and uncomfortable but needed to be said whether I liked it or not!  I'm not a minister or a minister in training or someone in leadership, I'm just plain ole me!  But I knew that it was important for someone like me to not only sound a warning but to make sure that a message of hope was being conveyed.  My confirmation that I am doing what God asks of me is confirmed when I read other blog posts and news reports and see that they are hitting on the same topics that I am, unbeknownst to me!  I post my blog then I go and read other bloggers and I go "oh my gosh, they're talking about the same exact thing!"  God is trying to get a message out and he will use whomever and whatever means necessary to get the point across!  That is awesome!  For my part, it's a big responsibility to make sure I get it right!

So what is the point being made today?  Our country had a good foundation.  The United Methodist Church had a good foundation.  Sometimes though the weight of the system presses down so hard that the foundation starts to crumble.  The goodness still exists, we just have to stabilize and reclaim the soundness! It's time to start rebuilding the foundation.

In regards to our country, the foundation that needs to be rebuilt rests on jobs.  If people are working they can pay their bills.  Working people pay taxes.  Working people save money and invest.  Working people buy things.  The little legislation that is coming out of Washington is crushing the foundation.  Add to that the bickering and inertia and the weight just keeps getting heavier.  We need to be praying for our leaders, more so now than ever!  They are an important part of stabilizing the country's foundation!  Pray for your local community leaders as well because they are invested in your community just as much as you are!  They don't want to see it die off, they want to live in a community that thrives!  We need to pray that they have the wisdom to act in the best interests of everyone, the inspiration to help create new and exciting ideas and the perseverance to stick it out and see it through!  I truly believe that change will come from the bottom up and my darling friends it starts with you and me and a willingness to help and to hold our leaders accountable!

As to the United Methodist Church, there is a real need to get back to basics.  People come to church looking for grace, guidance, hope, inspiration-they have questions and they are looking for answers.  We need to encourage people to read their Bible and teach them how to read it and why it matters!  We need to teach them how it can apply to their everyday lives beyond Sunday morning service!  We need to pray for them and with them and we need to teach them how to pray on their own, no matter the circumstance.  We need to teach them how to listen for that still small voice-the Holy Spirit who will guide and support them no matter where they are, no matter what they are doing.  We need to teach them how to praise God and count their blessings and to be thankful for each day, hour, minute and second.  We need to teach them why being a part of a community of believers matters in their lives and how sharing the sacraments is more than going through the motions, it's a spiritual bond to God, their family, their church family and their community.  We need to pray for our Spiritual leaders as well to guide us and hold them accountable to preach the gospel and teach others in our church how to lead, not just follow.  From personal experience, I would say that the greatest leaders are the most willing servants.  They inspire others because their actions truly line up with their words!  We need more servant leaders!

It's not too late!  We've been given a warning.  The foundation can be fixed.  We just have to decide if we are willing to do the work to fix it!  I believe that many people are willing, they just need the encouragement to follow through!  My darling friends, let's get to work on fixing the foundation today!

pour Pour POUR!

Yes, I like the Prophets.  They give me hope!  Joel 2:28-29 is one of my favorites:

"...I will pour out my Spirit on all people.  Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions.  Even on my servants, both men and women, I will pour out my Spirit in those days."

To me, this is the ultimate in balance because everyone is included, young and old, men and women.  If only the church leadership could get this idea! 

I've focused a lot on the Millennium generation and young people and young adults.  But there is another segment that tends to get left out-older adults. 

I remember as a teenager that the people I got along with best at church were the older adults.  You know why?  Because they would actually TALK to me!  I loved, loved, LOVED the older members of our congregation!  And when they couldn't come to church anymore guess who the teens in youth group would go and visit?  You betcha-the older adults from our congregation! 

I was incredibly blessed as a pre-teen and young teen to meet a lady with an incredible vision!  Her name:  Winnie Wrisley.  Winnie grew up in Waterbury and became a Deaconess within the United Methodist church.  She was a teacher and spent many years in New Mexico at a UMC mission school on a Native American Reservation.  She retired and came back home to little ole Waterbury, Vermont to take care of her mother.  I first met her when she took over the Friday afternoon children's church class.  We had a teacher, his name was Charlie.  Teaching rambunctious little terrors was not exactly Charlie's gift.  He quit so Winnie stepped in to teaching role.  I loved her right from the get-go!  About that time the Waterbury Center Community church was without a minister and it looked like it was going to have to close its doors permanently.  Winnie's mother had been raised in that church and if I remember correctly, her family had been one of the founding families for the church.  Guess who decided that retirement was over rated?  Winnie.

One of the first things that Winnie did was buy some tape recorders and blank cassettes.  They were placed up front right by the lectern and every Sunday service was recorded.  Once the service was over, the tape recorders with the cassette tapes were placed in a bag with a bulletin and a hymnal and volunteers delivered them to the members who were no longer able to make it to church on Sunday mornings.  She also bought a traveling communion set and would go and offer communion to these members on a regular basis.  We young whipper-snappers were called in to help as well!  We sang a lot of songs out of the old Cokesbury hymnbook because we knew that it was someones favorite and it would brighten their day when they listened to the service! 

Winnie had an amazing gift!  She knew how to bridge the generation gap.  She didn't see the church family in little segments and slices.  Her vision saw everything as part of the whole.  There was warp and weave and rhythm.  Everything was balanced and in proportion and everyone felt included!

Some of the proposals and programs being put forth by the UMC concern me greatly!  In my opinion there is a lot of slicing and dicing and counting going on and a huge thrust to "meet consumer tastes" at the expense of real discipleship!  And I'm afraid that older adults have been lost in the shuffle which is a shame!  As much as I want to see younger children, youth and young adults included I do not want it done at the expense of older members who are still a part of the congregation whether they can come to church or not!  If one lone Deaconess could figure it out back in the late 1970's without the aid of "church growth plans" or consultants why can't our leadership? 

Holy Spirit, pour, Pour POUR your vision out on young and old and everyone in between!  Help us to see the whole picture and not just focus on pieces and segments.  Help us find new and creative ways to serve and disciple all of your children!  That my dear darling friends is my prayer.  I don't want to see anyone left by the wayside because everyone is a precious child of God! 

And Winnie-the rest of the story:  she led the congregation at Waterbury Center Community Church for many years and then retired (again) and moved to a UMC retirement home in North Carolina.  Among the many things that she did while there  was to spend time tutoring at risk youth.  She passed away this past winter.  Servant right up to the end!  I loved her dearly and I miss her greatly!  I wish you could have known her!